Here I am, sitting in the commons with the Fritz girls, watching Gilmore Girls and discussing Jess and Scott Mckeon. Jess: Gilmore Girls boy. Scott Mckeon: Fritz celebrity crush. Actually, mostly my celebrity crush. But they all love him, and don't need to deny it.

Homework of the day: The Illy-YAD. I literally laughed out loud while reading this.

"He led out the horse, then placed it in the handsof Menelaus, whose heart melted like the dewon ripening ears of corn, when fields are bristlingwith the crop—that's how, Menelaus, your heart softened in your chest."

That's how my heart softens too.

"The winning prize was a huge tripod to place above a fire,whose value among themselves Achaeans setat twelve oxen. Into the middle of the crow he then brought out the loser's prize, a woman skilled in every kind of work, worth four oxen."

As professor Macallister put it, "That must have been some pot! I wanna see this thing..."

This just makes me really glad I didn't live in a Greek epic. As I am not skilled in every kind of work, I'm proabably worth, like, one ox. An ox baby. An ox baby tooth.

Lesson of the day: only make a Wal-mart run if you have an unlimited amount of time. I had to make a Wal-mart run for Morgan's party tomorrow. It involved bubbles, colored hair spray, and smartees.

[Insert: At the moment, my roommate has a bowl on her head.]

However, I barely made it back in time to be "Granny Fritz" for our Fritz hall family dinner. I had on a polka-dotted dress, a blue bathrobe, earthshoe sandals, pearls, a hair clip, baby powder, snazzy sunglasses, lipstick, and an attitude. Lisa's umbrella made a very nice cane. Molly was my pregnant child (she was giving birth to the Fritz fetus), Britney was her husband, and everyone else was their children. Lisa, Alyssa, and Kate: emo-teen devil-children. Michelle and Lauren: the little fritzees. Amy: the adopted child. Laura: cousin Cheryl. I made one hot granny. I would describe myself as cantankerous. At the moment, everyone is giggling hardcore ar Molly's pictures. They'll be on facebook one day, I promise. Quote: "Molly, you're kind of terrifying in that picture." "I did not want to remember that at all." "Laura, how are you so creepy??"

[Insert: Lisa took the bowl off her head.]

[Fail. Now it's back.]

I still have baby powder in my hair.

Song of the day: Here Comes the Sun. Doo doo doo doo.