Ok, ok, don't be hatin' on me cuz it's only been a day...my blog, not yours. If you're bein rebellious, just read the one before this and skip this one.

I had a thoughtful car ride, and this one is for my own benefit, kind of.

So, I have this friend named Mitch. I doubt he's keeping up with my blog, so I'm not really worried. I've only spent time with him twice in my life, but since then I've still thought about him a lot and he's kind of stuck with me. Mitch is gay. Not to say that I don't have other gay friends, but he's the only one I've ever really talked to about it. At Governor's School, I watched him get hurt over a guy, and it really broke my heart to watch. Mitch was also raised a Christian and has since rejected the beliefs. And he's a big advocate for gay rights.

Because of him, I've been a lot more interested in figuring out exactly what my views are on the whole subject, homosexuality and Christianity. Almost hungry for information, actually. It's kind of funny, too, because even though I've learned so much since then, I still feel like I don't know enough, and maybe that's just because I've never proclaimed myself gay and athiest.

I've found it so hard to watch those who live without Christ and those who make fun of Him. It isn't just Mitch and his friends, obviously there are others. Just walk off of Covenant campus lol. But you almost want to ask them--exactly how full do you feel? People who fill their lives with stuff that isn't Jesus will tell you they feel full. Some of them do feel that way. But no one can really understand the fullness that Jesus gives without experiencing it. There's something about his wonderful, beautiful, and irresistable grace that is, well, irresistable.

It's not a party high, it's not a night of laughter, it's not a cigarette, which all, shortly after they're over, can leave you unsatisfied. It's not another person, who can let you down. It's not one of those things that, eventually, leaves you feeling more empty than you did when you started. Yes, it's a craving, but not one out of addiction or need. It's one of those things that, if you do it right, will never, ever leave you feeling empty. You always have someone to lean back on. You always have a purpose. You never have a moment when someone doesn't care for you, even if no human does.

And you can talk facts all day, depending on what scholar you study, your own conclusions--bla bla bla. People will argue back and forth until the stars fall down. Truth is, even if every single word in the Bible were backed up by concrete proof, even if we could travel back in time and see it all happen, even if Jesus came back RIGHT NOW and showed everyone He was God, those arguments would still exist.

Truth is, the Bible is the most accurate historical document out there. Truth is, Jesus was a real person, He really died, and He really did rise from the dead, even though skeptics want to go out on every possible limb they can to say He didn't. Truth is, Christianity is different from every other religion on the planet. It is not motivated by fear, obligation, or desire for power. True Christianity is motivated by love. What's better than that???

It's not a fairytale. People who read parts of it out of context will want to call it one, but the smart ones who study the background in depth, who understand the literature, who have the proper standing to argue it, will take it seriously. And those who really believe it and live by it will be the most incredible people you will ever meet.

Problem is, a lot of people who claim to live by it don't. Here's where we come into the homosexuality part. Yes, the Bible does say it's wrong. There is no question about that, no way to get around it if studying the texts properly--it says it, the end. It also says gluttony is wrong, alcoholism is wrong, premarital sex is wrong, and dancing naked around an idol is wrong. So if it says so many things are wrong, why is it that Christians treat homosexuality like a disease? It's not! Some will tell fags they are going to hell and others will try to "cure" them, and neither of these is right!

Some people are pre-dispositioned towards different kinds of sin. Some were born to be morally looser than others, some wanna eat too much, and some are natural alcoholics. It's the way they were created. It's not fair, it makes life harder for them, but that's the way it is.

Our society lifts up loving another person, finding one's soulmate, as the epitomy of life. The whole point of life is finding a life companion! But this is such a skewed view. Even after marriage, a lot of people don't feel full. Don't get me wrong--I want to get married as much as the next girl--but if I don't, my life will still be full of meaning. And the thing about getting married is that, no matter what, that person can and will leave you unsatisfied, even if they stay til death do you part. So people yell at Christians saying that it isn't fair for homosexuals to not be able to get married and have a life partner while heterosexuals can. Excuse me? Fair? When has life ever been fair?

See here's the thing. Life is not fair for a reason. The harder one's life is, the closer one can draw to God. It is a glorious opportunity. Some people speculate that Paul's "thorn" that he spoke about may have been a homosexual orientation because it never left and Paul was celibate his whole life. Who knows. But where you can't find your happiness on earth, you must find it in God, and the more happiness you find in God--actually, you should be finding joy--the more wonderful life will be, with or without a partner.

So, point is, Christian + homosexual? Yes, it can work. Christian + homosexual + partner? No, that can't work.

Homosexuality is not a disease, it's another sinful person that needs to be loved, just as everyone is. Christianity is not a set of rules and regulations based on a book of stories, it's this real, wonderful God that wants to love you and be loved in return.

There are so many people out there that need to know that in this broken world.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so scared to speak out in truth, because I don't want people to disrespect my Jesus. But then again, Jesus can take care of Himself.