Famous and Not on Drugs. I'm a Rarity.

Serious music makes me feel serious.

That's not entirely truthful.

It's Friday night. How did I spend it? I helped a lady clean her house. Then I came back and did homework. Everyone else went places like the mall or the movies, and I'm the cool kid who did productive things that will one day benefit society and especially me. For example, one day when that mom and her family are rich and famous, they will remember me and pull some strings to make me rich and famous also. And, more plausibly, doing homework will help me get a degree, which will get me a job as a teacher and I will become rich and famous on my own (that may actually be less plausible)! I have a really great montage going on in my mind right now.

Teacher Laura (holding trophy on stage): "I would like to thank everyone that helped me get this Oscar. My family who believed in me, my loyal friends, that *$%$*#%&$*&% Dewey paper I spent endless hours working on in order to graduate, and my beloved and slightly bratty fifth graders who helped me launch my rich-and-famous....teaching...career.
People in audience begin to whisper, "Wait, she went to college? She isn't really an actress? Why is she here?!?!

*ahem*

Word of the day: John Dewey. He is the word (haha...word up, Dewey-boy!) until November 30th. Yes, right after Thanksgiving. Thank you, Dr. Kauffman. Or Kaufmann. I can never remember. 

I seem to have acquired a new identity this week--"Baba Larve". It was acquired in two parts. The first, "Larve", is a combination of my first and last name and makes me sound like a nasty swamp insect-monster. The second came about like this: We were in Barnes and Noble last week and Alyssa made me read the fairytale Baba Yaga in a Russian accent. So 2 + 2 = "Baba Larve". And what does Baba Larve wear? A turban with a long sequined Russian skirt of wisdom. She also stuffs her bosom and stomach with plastic bags. Sometimes my roommate claims I do drugs....but I don't. I'm not sure where she gets this idea. Baba Larve would be absolutely terrifying on crack cocaine. 

I draw this little cartoon character named Fuzzymunch when I'm bored in class, and he is all that I aspire to be and more. But sometimes I do think he does drugs. 

The PCA Global Missions Conference was last weekend. Our church choir sang in it (I only sing in the choir because they let me dance onstage which I'm singing. Like Fuzzymunch. Good ole Gospel choir) and it was awesome. Going to a missions conference made me think about going overseas again. Until a couple weeks ago, I thought my life after graduation would go like this:

1) Get a master's degree. 

2) Teach. 

3) Get an apartment and four cats and three dogs. Or less than that. 

4) Eventually have children...with a man. 

5) Live....somewhere.

But I figured out that getting your master's too early is a bad idea for education majors, so now maybe I'll go teach overseas for a bit. I can't forget that last summer in Uganda was hard, even though it was a blessing. Being single overseas is not fun...here it's not so bad, there you just get lonely and gape at any American male who crosses your path. Leaving family for a long time isn't fun either, but since my plan next summer is to stay home, I'm hoping I'll be sick enough of my family after four months with them to last me another two years. 

I got a bad sunburn this week after doing a project outside for two hours. It's November, folks. Sunburns are NOT in style. 

I learned this week that off-campus college students live off of cheap food like corndogs and funfetti. And, when they get really desperate, the occasional spear-hunted mouse. (the last one has yet to be visually confirmed) 

Four of the paragraphs in this blog began with the word "I". Narcissist, much?

I spent a lot of this week contemplating things that aren't in my control. Not that I'm a total control freak, but I am a fixer (as are most women, it seems). But this verse was my favorite (we'll make it verse of the week):

"All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." 

--Psalm 139:16

I love the fact that God knows what he's doing, because I sure as heck don't. He even has everything written down in a planner...man, this guy is organized....

Oh lawww......

Word of the day: catharsis. I need a bit of that.

Let's talk about some random stuff.

Guinea pigs. I had a staredown with one the other day. I thought about sticking my hand in the cage and picking him up, but every time I unlatched the door he started freaking out and doing kung fu, like in the the movie G-Force.

Kindergarten soccer. A bunch of midgets mowing one another down while chasing a ball around a field and occasionally kicking it. And one really angry coach who seems to think that these 5-year-olds actually know all the rules of soccer.

Oatmeal and honey. Superb idea at first, but sickening after a while. You turn into a giant, dry ball of fiber. 

Ripped seams. I have no needles to fix them with, so I simply have to wallow in misery while I wear them, thinking about how much I wish they were fixed.

Halloween. Mmmm.

Country music. Makes me feel like a homebody in love. But I am neither. 

AIDS. A really depressing topic that reminds me of my kids in Africa. 

Knitting. A good way to pass chapel. 

Shower Safety. A way to keep yourself from passing out and dying in the shower. Step one: "Oh, I feel woozy."---Turn off the water. Step two: Step out of the shower. Step three: Lay on the ground and raise your knees to get good blood flow. Step four: When you feel better, drink something. Shower safety is key!

Rape of Nanking. A massacre that occurred in China. I had to write a paper on it. The topic made me depressed, so Lisa forced me to play with play-doh. I made a wanton.

Expired food. Bad idea. 

Bonfires and carved pumpkins. Games of hotseat and hitch, bang, or kill. 

Miscommunication. Sometimes it results in conflict, but other times it results in really hilarious phrases. Examples: 

"It's Hello Weenie Time!"

"They close at....terror."

"My sinner is in my buttocks."

Best night of the month--DISNEYPRINCESSONICE!!!!!!

Psalm 139. I've read it every day for the last week.

Everyone in this room is on the computer or iphone. Community at its finest. 

Taun-taun. My roommate taught me how to walk like one. 

Last minute presentations on Africa. I'm getting pretty good at those. 

Growing pains. 

Candy. 

Feta cheese. 

Knee-high socks and converse. 

Breaking fall, and cars.

My roommate is gone and it's terribly quiet in here. Too quiet. She'll be back in a little bit, with everybody else....but this is weird. I'm almost expecting a ninja to pop out of ceiling any moment, just as another one of her cruel tricks to make me scream. She was gone all last night, which was awfully creepy, because this is a big room with a lot of shadows and noises. I tried sleeping with a night light on, but it was red and I felt like I was lying in hell. Then I turned it off and pulled the covers over my head to protect myself from the goblins in my room that only come out when I'm alone in the dark. YIKES. Needless to say, if I ever have an apartment on my own, I am adopting four cats and three dogs so I'm not by myself....

Word of the week: Fall Break. Or lack thereof, as it is actually OVER.

I'm going to back up a night before fall break.

Every once in a while, my roommate and I have these really crazy, but not drug-induced nights (unless someone slipped something into my cereal...) Anyhow, it all started with an evening of the second Harry Potter movie. This turned into a game of figuring out how to rearrange everyone's names into something epic, like Tom Marvolo Riddle does with "I am Lord Voldemort". We came up with stuff like, "I am lil' Leech Sna'ell" and "I am Loony Trek" and "I am Blue Gray Carrot". Mine was "Larve, u so real." [which is funny because Larve is what Lisa and Alyssa call me] ANYWAY, around midnight, everyone left and Lisa and I went wacko, beginning with Lisa's idea to go into Kait and Amy's room: "Ok, I'll be the t-rex and you be the pterodactyl" leading to "I'm a rap artist!" to "I MOLTED." to "I can speak BLIND language!" to "I'm an origami lotus flower, I blossom, and I die" to "There's a koala in the couch!" to "What if everybody walked around like a zombie---like this..." to going to bed around 2 am. It's like being freshmen all over again, but with a more tired feeling when you wake up in the morning.

The next day, I took Emma St. John home for fall break. We had a splendid time. We went to Rainforest Adventures, where she almost peed her pants holding a snake. We went to {gorgeous} Cades Cove and decided where our house, church, and barn were, who our future husbands would be, and what we would do with our lives (eat turkey, ride bears, wear bonnets, birth babies, etc.) I took her to Gatlinburg, where we had {delectable} donuts and someone parked behind our car, meaning that we couldn't get out for a good thirty minutes and had to listen to a {LOUD} bluegrass concert. We ate some food at the Tin Roof cafe with {hilarious} Jordan Mitchell and got 0 studying done, regardless of our high goals. We also watched The Princess Diaries, Babies, Driving Miss Daisy, Jonas LA, and a lot of Justin Bieber youtube videos.

Beulah was at the car hospital three out of five of those days. They changed her oil, gave her new wheel bearings, and put on new brake pads (which was an accident--so I got those for free!). But, when I drove out of the parking lot,  I tried to go straight and ended up turning right--YIKES steering wheel misalignment. So I had to take her back...and then they had to drive her somewhere else to get fixed....and we didn't leave for another two hours....and Beulah was very, very upset.

Our room finally has a rug, thanks to TJ Maxx. But I still need to go shopping this weekend, because green chacos don't match very well with purple toes.

Fall doesn't actually appeal to me very much because I don't enjoy being cold or having to wear clothes. In fact, I would love to live in a world where I had to do neither of those things.

My roommate isn't back yet. I may need to go out and buy a kitten soon.

Song of the day: Jesse's Girl

Total Creeper

My mood changes with the wind. I have come up with a list of factors that affect my mood:
-background music. Sometimes guitar music makes me weep for NO REASON.
-amount of sleep the previous night. Less than 6 hours and you don't know what will happen next.
-the dreams I had during that sleep. Beautiful boyfriend? Good day. Dead sister? Bad day.
-food--partly dependent on the time of day it's eaten, who it's eaten with, and how much is eaten. Wilted salad at lunchtime, bad. Fifty-six pumpkin muffies with hallmates at 10 pm....sickeningly good.
-coffee and the time of day I drink it. Morning--perfect pick-up. Test time-AaAaAhHhH!.!.!.! mY pEnCiL wOn'T dO wHaT i WaNt WhAt'S wRoNg WiTh Me?!?!
-weather. Fog for more than six hours is like God telling me it's a day to weep.
-how many people I interact with. Just my roommate? I'm a tragic social outcast. Someone different every ten minutes? Dude, I'm so popular.
-then there are actual events that take place, those things that are supposed to affect your mood. Those are actually the least important, unless someone is dying.

Word of the day: Friday. It's. About. Time.

I had five tests over five consecutive days, as well as two papers and half a project. Basically, I'm reaching a state of scholastic apathy. A? B? D? Whatever. I just want to be done.

My mom is so cute. Over our last few phone conversations, she's given detailed war stories of her encounters with skunks, my dog Missy, skunks + Missy, and how bad the garage smells now.

The new Fritz is beginning to absorb its freshmen--finally. On Day of Prayer last week, eight Fritzers went to Rock City and had a breakfast picnic in the woods. It was fabulous.

Told you. The freshmen are AWESOME. Oh wait, one of those is me...

Speaking of freshmen and possible future freshmen, preview weekend was last weekend. The Fritz is very welcoming of its previewers. 

Actually, all of those were written by me. Someone else erased them. I'm not sure why.

Sometimes I accidentally refer to The Fritz like it's a cult. 

The Phantom of the Opera is a lot creepier movie than I remember it being. Sorry Christine, but a stalker man in a dank undergound lair with your mannequin in a wedding dress is NOT attractive, even if he is Gerard Butler. 

This Sunday at church, I sat next to a couple I knew and held their baby as the mom went up to sing. When it was meet-and-greet time, I turned to shake hands with a lady behind me and found that she was really interested in MY baby. Uhhh....

I said "thank you" to a Korean War veteran wearing spiffy red-white-and-blue suspenders in Walmart the other day and he lit up. It was great.

Principles in Sociology is by far my most interesting class this semester. Yesterday, I did a stalking project with a partner for class. It was called a "symbolic interaction" assignment, but, let's be honest, it was flat-out stalking. We tried to creep on some folks in Chik-fil-a, but that's actually harder than it sounds, so we went to the mall and followed a mom and three girls into Aeropostle--or maybe it was Abercrombie. Anyway, these girls were 6-8 years old, and the smallest one was a total whiner who ballet danced all the way to the store. The oldest one was a stick-in-the-mud and the middle girl was the youngest girl's friend, so she wasn't terribly interesting. The mom dressed like a sixteen-year-old and was about ready to sleep on the next available mall bench. The project says we have to figure out the hopes and dreams of these people. My educated guesses:

The mom is terribly depressed about not making it as America's next top model, but wants to make sure that her daughters do. She also wants a really long vacation. She entertains thoughts of leaving her youngest behind in a mall dressing room and running away to Hollywood to be an actress. 

The youngest wants to be a ballet dancer/actress/model and entertains thoughts of leaving her mother behind in a dressing room to run away to Hollywood. 

The best friend wants to do the exact same thing. 

The oldest girl feels that her dreams are being suppressed, and one day she is going to wake up and realize that she has enormous talent in the field of singing and songwriting. She, of the four, will make it stardom on the wings of her musical abilities and her sad guitar songs will one day make me weep my eyes out on a foggy day when I have three girls of my own and have just eaten fifteen pumpkin muffies for dinner.

I began tutoring a kindergartner this week, and it's going to be more challenging than I expected. He needs to learn his letters---but they won't stick for anything. Basically, if I can help this kid out, I can do anything when I'm a teacher. 

Diary of a Wimpy Kid is the funniest book I've ever read. 

I saw a founders boy in white shorts and fuzzy Ugg boots. I was a little creeped out.

God's teaching me about forgiveness this week. It's kind of a hard lesson to learn, because it's not one of those instantaneous lessons (who am I kidding? How many of God's lessons are instantaneous?). Forgiveness is a heart change--not just a feeling. It's weird, needing to learn to forgive someone I thought I was close to, who I love. I just pray that, rather than being angry over getting shut out of her life, I remember that I love her. And I pray that she realizes it too. 

Song of the day: 

One Upon a December from Anastasia.

Fall--finally.

Last week I invented an automatic cupcake flying machine, but since I didn't blog about it in time, it actually didn't happen and was erased from my memory. That is why blogging gaps are bad.

Word of the day: pumpkin. Sometimes I wish I was one--happy and round and tasty.

I never blogged about the day Kilter happened, so I've decided to do it now. Earlier that day, The Fritz sat in overflow chapel and listened to a sermon on what it means to be a man (which is extremely applicable to my life) which means that I had the manly Mulan song stuck in my head all afternoon. Actual Kilter happened that night, with Kait, Mary Claire, and I all dressed up as sisters with pigtails. First, we couldn't find the creative discovery museum (which is where Kilter was). Then we accidentally got on the interstate. Then we turned around and couldn't find it again. Then we parked several blocks away. Then we trekked all over downtown, fully clad in ridiculous clothes, to find somewhere to eat. Then we made it to the dance--alive.We had a fantastic time.

The next day, the three of us + Lisa went downtown to Coolige, where we got to watch a wedding and show off our terrible football throwing skills. My roommate is a phantom. I missed a ball, and while I unsuspectingly loafed toward it, she suddenly swooped out of nowhere and snatched it up, making me scream in sheer terror. Thank you, phantom roommate. We also discovered that Sweet Cece's froyo is DELICIOUS.

On Sunday, Nachofest happened. Because I'm on Andreas Building Council (and Andreas hosts Nachofest), my whole day pretty much revolved around it. Also, because I live on The Fritz and our theme was "Siesta Fiesta", I wore Cookie Monster pajamas for much of that time. As I ran up and down floors trying to make sure everyone had enough food to serve, I felt a little bit like a waitress and a lot a bit like a silly, sleepy, Sesame Street salsa dancer. How's that for alliteration??

Lisa says this photo kind of sums up our relationship.

Last Monday, I spent the evening laughing my rear off as some boys I babsat told me ridiculous jokes: 

"What's black and white and black and white and black and white and green? Three skunks and a pickle!"

"Knockknockwhosthere??....*silent pause*....haha! I win!"

I started choir at New City, which is a nice way to get involved in the church. Because of this, I also got drafted into helping lead chapel worship on Friday. This is not the kind of thing I normally do. On Friday, we were up on stage and everyone else knew what they were doing while I continually tried to create a balance between dancing to the music and not hitting the microphone with my chin every five seconds. On the upside, I looked really pretty. And God was definitely praised. 

Last weekend, Alyssa, Kait, Lisa, and I all headed up to Lisa's house for fun times. We watched a scary movie on accident (summed up in the words "happy happy space cowboy--BLARGEREHERG!!!!), almost got killed by Lisa on a golf cart, went to a chili cookoff, played five hours of poker, watched a happy movie, went to church, and had a nice quiet time on her back porch. And took a lot of hilarious pictures.

On the downside, I feel like I have lost two good friends this week. First, I lost my GBF Chris. He ended up being a lot different than Morgan and I thought he was, and we both got hurt. Second, I kind of lost Morgan. Shocker, right? I didn't even see this coming. A small disagreement came up, and all of the sudden she unleashed all these things that she had been bottling up for a long time and declared that we don't know each other like we thought we did. I guess she's right. Then she declared a friend break until I grow up. So, this past week, I felt like I went through a second breakup. Yeah, that sucks. I'm also really confused about what this means for our future, because I had all these plans and now they may dissolve. 

And maybe we're both being overdramatic. 

I'll just wait it out, pray about it, and concentrate on the lovely friends that I have here that are in the same stage of life I am.

My roommate has a movie set of Sunrise Earth. It's a bunch of sunrises without any commentary. Last week we watched "Moose in the Morning"--an entire hour of moose, clouds, lake, mountains, ducks, and the sunrise. It was AWESOME.

We had a really bad thunderstorm last week, and a bunch of stupid boys decided that it would be a good idea to go play football and dodge the lightning that was ON the mountain. Idiots. Well, funny idiots.

Today is officially the first day that it feels like fall. Yes: to pretty leaves and cool weather. No: to being closer to cold, miserable winter.

Song of the day that WILL NOT GET OUT OF MY HEAD: Love Like Woe by The Ready Set

I'm always making progress.

So here's the deal. I have all this homework to do, but my mind is in such a frenzy that I can't concentrate on it to save my life, and I need to get ready for bed in 45 minutes. And I haven't blogged in a long time. Gaps in blogs are bad, because when I am 85 years old looking back at my college life, I'm going to go "Oh, what did I do on September 13, 2010?" and then I'll see that I might have done something really important--like solve world hunger or invent remote-controlled men--but been too busy to blog about it and at that point in my life I'll be too old to remember whether or not I actually did it.

On that note, the word of the day is: yikes. It's my new keyphrase. I've said it at least ten times today and I'm starting to annoy myself.

Now we'll make a list of a bunch of random stuff that happened in the last week and a half:

• I figured out that when the clock in the back of the classroom doesn't work and you are too apprehensive to check the time on your cell for fear of being caught, you may glance at the professor's upside-down watch to see if class is even getting close to being over. Most of the time you will be disappointed.
• When I go home and attend high school football games and county fairs, I acquire a country accent. 
• I love my sister. She's the reason I risked acquiring said accent so I could see her play in the high school band. And I had a dream that she got cancer that made me depressed for the rest of that day. 
• I saw a Tool on campus do the Bieber hair flip and I nearly laughed aloud. 
• Last night I served food at a pro-life banquet, met Pam Tebow, and was informed that Tim Tebow is still single. Yay Tim Tebow the famous football player!
• My roommate and I have decided that when we lose one another in Walmart, one of us will simply screech "ca-CAW!" and the other will answer so that we may know each other's location. We have also nicknamed one another Honeylumps and Prickepits--though neither of us is lumpy or prickly.
• I laugh way too easily, usually at the wrong time. 
• I get to do children's art in class on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Yesterday I did a self-portrait. Afterwards, I showed it off to one of my friends and she asked, "Who is that?" Fail.
• Brian Peppers is BAAAACK!
• Lisa brought back Zumba and now I want to constantly shake my hips. She also bought supplies last week to make AWESOME pumpkin crafts. She's the bomb-diggity.
• Enough about my roommate.
• I'm getting old. I have a scheduled bedtime.
• I have started a point system for getting healthier--in other words, I give myself stars for good behavior. I get depressed when I don't make three stars. Today, I will only make one and a half. I'm too lazy to zumba.
• We watched a Star Trek clip in psych class today. 
• Mangoes are DELICIOUS.
• Hold on--I've only been here for three weeks? Say what??
• I miss Uganda--probably because I went to a Kenyan woman's house on Sunday and have had some Africa-food this week. 
• People probably think I'm weird for knitting in chapel. I would think I was weird too if chapel weren't so boring without it. I'm willing to put up with weird if I'm entertained. I forgot it today and ended up staring at some boy rubbing the back of his chair legs for no reason while smelling the bad breath of the person next to me. YIKES. 

Song of the week: Just the Way You Are--B.o.B.

Pam Tebow!!

Random, scary VBS picture from when I was six.

Look how far I've come.

Puerile Silliness

Word of the day: sunburn. I'm hoping I got one, because today is one of the last chances I'll have to make up for the skin-darkening opportunities I missed when I was slathering myself with sunscreen in Uganda.

Second word of the day: puerile. I just discovered this word and I'm not entirely sure how to pronounce it. It means "childish or immature". Quite fitting, actually.

I did a lot of really random, puerile things this week. Let's hop around a bit.

I watched a lot of Gilmore Girls, which is food for my feminine soul. I also watched the Amanda Show and Xena: Warrior Princess (no, I did not spend my money on this--my puerile roommate did and we indulged ourselves in its cheesiness). This makes me sound like a slave to our television. I assure you, I am not. Mostly.

One night Lisa, Kait, and I went out on the veranda and spun around until we were extraordinarily dizzy. Then we went inside and made faces and funny noises at each other--you know, like that farting noises that you made as a kid by blowing onto your palms. I can't believe I was so puerile.

Another night, a group of us were in Target for a very long time. And Blockbuster. And Halloween Express. Speaking of Halloween--dude, I'm ready for it right NOW! Lisa bought a Martha Stewart magazine of all these cool things you can do for Halloween and delicious things you can make. Pumpkin cupcakes? Can I have them now?

I've had really vivid dreams all week. I dreamed that a spider tried to eat my face off. I dreamed that a cult captured me while I was on a tubing vacation and I couldn't escape (but I did share Jesus with someone because I thought we were gonna die! Bonus points!). I dreamed that I died several times. Then we went to the drive-in last night and saw Inception and I didn't WANT to dream after that.

Speaking of the drive-in--guess what we did last night? Yeah. It was fun. Double feature, $5, 2:00 am, yes please.

Unfortunately, Mary Claire, Emily, and I got shafted to the back seat on the way there.

I've had three RAs on campus this weekend. Lydia, the current one, of course. Then Molly came on Friday night. Then Lauren-the-original-Fritz came with high schoolers and invaded the hall all weekend. Man-oh-man. It's like contract-enforcers times THREE. No puerile naughtiness this weekend, girls!

I think I'm in love with Lloyd Dobbler. 

Josiah Meneghini just brought me the brownies he promised back in July. I think everyone should be friends with him. He's made of sunshine.

Covenant has some strange people in it. Example: there is a girl in one of my classes who nicknamed herself  "dragon" in Japanese. On Friday, she came to class with horns on her head. If this metamorphosis continues and she comes to class on Monday with black wings, I will be legitimately frightened. 

My roommate and I are on a hunt for rugs, and it's been unsuccessful so far. We are in dire need of something to cover up this tile. 

I bought two pairs of $3 shoes this week. 

I need babysitting moola to feed my needs. 

Looking down--yes, yes, I am indeed darker. YESS.

Song of the day: Magic---B.o.B